belief comes First

being Free of the So-Cal batosLoco, i found a healthy way of viewing drama on Bravotv a channel filled with Drama--walls from every angle, stylist, fashion designer, interior designer & workout. i accidentally fell into workout one morning i was getting dressed (who said cable tv is evil?) the show is centered around woman owned, openly gay

workout studio in LosAngeles-where the owner tells it straight & has a bod made of rock. she's bright, intelligent & with a clear mission on health; this morning workout showed a heartwarming episode of how she came to realize that her relationship of 5 years was Over- wanting to make an attempt of going to therapy-she went to 1 single session with her partner who treated her this way by shutting her down (deflection) &

walking out & berating her. i realized i was watching the pomegranate ex & fighting on TV in a therapists office!! encompassing moment was when the therapist asked her if she thought the relationship was worth Fighting for; watching it was cathartic. thank You BravoTV for workout! people are hot, workouts are hard, leaving clients winded & craving the adrenaline rushes. enough about beautiful pecs, gorgeous guys who sweat....

there are flashing advertising on the sides of the stadium where Manchester United play(old trafford) one of their mantra's flash when players score @ home on the opposing team. Belief Comes First.

flash,
flash,
flash:

i am usually standing on a chair hugging my friends & screaming Number1, Number1!! i am not bandwagonFan, becoming a supporter when i was home 15 years ago; dragged to watch on sunday afternoons. the time i began my Xtraining, happen the way most things do in my life by accident.

Belief 2 me is ability to Trust including Honesty (something our culture seems to have Forgotten is a rendeeming trait& having to be earned.)

currently residing next to a mall; there's nothing more cliché than seeing genXer's walking hand in hand window-shopping @ anchor stores..how sentimental & romantic! Not. i was once asked on a date to this wunderland of credit debt; asking the guy if he was kidding? am i in high school with a curfew? i made a decision a decade ago when we got a string outlet centers next to our town; resolved myself to Stop shopping @ the mall if could get kewl stuff for half price with half the drive & half the headache.

back to the main topic-Belief Comes First.

a few years ago i had no idea who I Was outside of relationships, or Love. i thought love came with strings & meant walking around on eggshells. being trapped in my past for a week was good; being treated poorly everyday IS Not a sign of respect/Love. years ago, i tolerated being strung along with tall tales& emptier Promises-without the happy endings.

i have learned working on my own issues that the pomegranate ex is my Comfort Zone guy. (you're sitting there wondering why i use the word comfort?) Comfort means accepting abusive, belittling & destructive behavior. i am done with the ComfortZone behavior that is not signs of Love but Abuse. i have camped out in the Comfort Zone for a decade. i had a cabin in land of denial because inside i felt that i couldn't do Better. now i realize i can..

i am also not expecting prince Sane instantly---he will show up when i am back on equal footing & figuring-out my current health issues. if i'm given permission to run again? maybe i will meet him on my favorite, muddy staircase-(outside grunchy guys are the best!) i was sprinting till last April. good news-Finally Released from physical therapy after 10+ months of 2 weekly visits!! i celebrated with ciroc martini's, deathcake & sigh of relief... Belief comes First.

http://www.manutd.com -homepage of #1...
http://www.cupcakeroyale.com/ -home of the deathCake.
http://www.bravotv.com/blog/jackiewarner- the owner of skylab in los angeles blogs about her relationship